FBI Agent David "Killer" Keller Rides Again
- by J. Orlin Grabbe, posted to the Internet November 26, 1996

David "Killer" Keller thinks I was talking about him in "The Dickheads Are Getting Desperate." Therefore I suppose it can be safely assumed that he is making the hard-to-refute assertion that he is, in fact, a dickhead. But, in general, "Killer" Keller exudes a little confusion about the meaning and intent of certain terms and certain sentences. In short, FBI agent David "Killer" Keller is still in the process of learning to read.

Take the term "Angel of Death." It was a term applied to Charles S. Hayes because of his role in persuading certain politicians to retire. The only "death" involved is the death of the career of a corrupt politician. But "Killer" Keller explained to the Court on October 25, 1996, that this label proved Hayes is a menace to society. That is, "Killer" Keller apparently thinks the resources of the FBI should be employed to defend corrupt politicians. Or else he is deliberately misinterpreting the meaning of the term "Angel of Death".

Here is the way Judge J. B. Johnson wrote up the discussion in his "Memorandum Opinion and Order" of October 28, 1996, whereby he denied bail for Hayes:

"Other evidence was introduced to show that a magazine, "Media Bypass", featured Hayes on its cover in the September 1996 edition, and referred to him as an "Angel of Death." However, nothing in this article justifies the label, and Agent Keller admitted the magazine is not a credible source. On the other hand, Hayes was quoted in a local newspaper (Pulaski Week) as saying the magazine article "is very credible". The latter states that "Chuck Hayes became known on the Internet as 'the Angel of Death' ".

"An Internet page, dated September 18, 1996, under the title of "The Dickheads are Getting Desperate" allegedly written by J. Orlin Grabbe was also introduced into evidence by Agent Keller. Keller is highly suspicious that Hayes is the real author because it refers to four federal agents showing up in Nancy, Kentucky "asking questions about Chuck 'the Angel of Death' Hayes". It concludes:

" "If I were a good citizen of the State of Kentucky, I would strap on my weapons and go looking for federal agents....because they do happen to be murderous bastards, and I might need to protect myself in legal and justifiable self-defense by blowing someone's head off.""

Well, I guess I'll have to explain things slowly to Mr. Keller. 1) I wrote the article, and Charles S. Hayes did not write it. 2) The phrase "murderous bastards" refers to people like you, Mr. "Killer" Keller, and not to Charles S. Hayes. 3) I very carefully wrote that last sentence to read "protect myself in legal and justifiable self-defense". Do you understand the word "legal"? Do you understand the word "justifiable"? Do you understand the meaning of "self-defense"?

Since you seem to have a problem with these concepts, let me suggest the following exercise -- something you can mull over when you have those philosophical discussions with Assistant US Attorney Martin Hatfield and US Attorney Joseph Famularo.

It is recorded in the Book of Judges that when the Philistines came against him, Samson "found a new jawbone of an ass, and put forth his hand, and took it, and slew a thousand men therewith" (Judges 15:15). Now, Mr. "Killer" Keller, here are your questions: Was this action legal? Under whose law? Was it justifiable? Why or why not? Did Samson act in self-defense? Why or why not? How would your answers change if, instead, Samson had slain a thousand FBI agents? What if he had used an old jawbone?

Your reasoning is very curious in other ways also, Mr. Keller. In my post "The Dickheads Are Getting Desperate", I referred to sixteen government agents, not four. Did you think the number was four, because you were among one of those groups of four agents? Were you one of the people looking to find some way to "get to" Charles Hayes?

Are you the true author of this post, Mr. David "Killer" Keller? After all, it asks questions about you. And by the way, with regard to that organization that you work for, the FBI: Is it chartered?

November 26, 1996
Web Page: http://www.aci.net/kalliste/